Someone very close to us has been going through a lot of heartache lately... literal 'Ache in her Heart'. She had been married for almost 20 years and it ended officially today. It really struck me... all the changes she is going through when I saw her name change 'officially' on facebook.
Before getting married I often thought to myself, "How do people get divorced after that long? What is the deal? How does that happen?". Once again, the Lord is teaching me how to continually improve upon my mortal thought patterns.
I totally get it now... it is in the everyday decisions. I know that she has worked very hard in her life. I know she has worked very hard to keep her family together. I know that she has followed the spirit as much as she knows how. Yet, because of everyday decisions in their lives, she and her husband ended up on opposite sides.
There are many days when your dad and I do not see 'eye to eye' on things. There have been many days when I have been 'in the box' towards him, and he towards me. There have been countless times when we have had walls up between the two of us. On those days, I have thought to myself, "This is how it happens. This is how all of a sudden 20 years down the road you don't know who you are living with anymore."
Thank heavens your dad and I have chosen to come back to each other, to work it out together and to 'let down the walls'. We have chosen to connect again, we have chosen to love each other no matter what. We have chosen it, he for me and I for him...and for the Lord. But that is the magic in these statements.... WE. The two most 'perfect' people could get married and everyone around them think that they have got it made. BUT, if their everyday decisions aren't moving them together with the Lord, then eventually their marriage will wither and die.
My heart tonight hurts so much for her. I was single for a long time, I can't even imagine going back to being single again after almost 20 years... PLUS being a single mom. But what I can imagine and know with all my heart is the Lord has her in the palm of His hands. I know the Lord is not a God of fear. There is no lack of love in His universe. And she is choosing with all her heart to have faith in Him and love Him. That is everything she can do. And tonight, He will hold her close to His heart, in order to help hers to stop aching for a bit. The Lord will hold her heart safe in His hands until she finds a man who will keep it safe in his.
Always love people, always. We never know what they are going through and what battles they are facing. You never know if the person driving beside you on the road, or standing behind you in line, or walking past you on the sidewalk just had their marriage end and their name's changed, just like this woman who is ultimately important and valuable to us and everyone else in her world.
I love you,
Your Mom
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