When You Feel Like It

Dear Gabriel,

I now understand why my mom (your MiMi) would go crazy whenever we would whine. She could handle almost anything, but whining. It was one of those 'whiney' days for you. No matter what tactic I tried to get you to use a normal voice, you still wanted to try out those 'whiney' vocal chords.

The interesting part about watching you through this stage of life is that a lot of times you just act the way that I feel. As adults, we don't have that luxury of just acting out ALL our true emotions... which is a good thing and a bad thing all at the same time. On days like today, there were plenty of times that I wanted to do some whining of my own. There is a lot that I can learn from seeing and experiencing how open you are with every emotion you feel.

When you feel like crying, you cry. When you feel like whining, you whine. When you feel like yelling, you yell. But ALSO....When you feel like laughing so hard that is hurts, you laugh. When you feel like snuggling and comfort, you snuggle. When you feel like kissing, you kiss. When you feel like hugging, you hug. When you feel like playing and running, you play. You are an expert at just feeling.

I can do better of showing my emotions, not letting walls hold me back and just 'feeling'. But - maybe not with the yelling and whining part. ;-)

I love you,

Your Mom

Angels Are With Us

Dear Gabriel,

I have been doing a lot of contemplating in the last few days about a blessing I received many, many years ago at the hands of one of the strongest and best men I have ever met in my life. My dad - your Papa - was there with me and the spiritual experience that it was still shakes me to my core. One of those experiences that I will tell you about one day. It is an experience very select few in my life have ever heard about.

From that experience and others, many years ago, I can also tell you this - our family is profoundly protected. Jesus holds our hands every day because we are under an extreme attact by Satan. I have been feeling especially in the last week, almost seeing him in my mind's eye, pounding on our door and yelling at me to let him in instead of Christ. Satan is angry at me, at you, at Talia and at your father for fighting everyday to keep angels surrounding us and our home.

I am reminded of one of my favorite stories in the Old Testament. The stories in the Old Testament teach us about having living, purposeful and forceful faith. This story is the one about Elisha and his servant. They found out they were going to be attacked by the king. His servant went out and looked around their house and they were surrounded by an army! He ran back in and basically said (of course I am paraphrasing here ;-), "Dude... Elisha. We are dooooomed!!". Elisha was calm and simply said, "Go look again. I think you will see something different. There are angels all around us... those that are with us are MORE than those against us." (full account of the story is in 2 Kings 6: 8-16)

Whenever I feel Satan's poundings... When I feel him reaching out to try and grab me, or any of my family, that story comes to my mind. I feel the angels around us. I feel the Lord's strength. I feel Christ's guiding hand. Then, in special moments, I am allowed to see the army that is surrounding us and protecting us.

Remember that nothing can hurt you. Those that are with us truly are more than those that are against us. Never forget about having that living, purposeful and forceful faith. Right now while you are young, I am jealous of you. You get to walk hand in hand with Jesus everyday. For me, that is what helps keep angels surrounding us all the time.

I love you,

Your Mom