Dear Kids,
There is a false sense of obligation for many people that comes along with the "New Year". This obligation = Resolutions.
I have quite a few friends who are already joking about making goals (and I quote), "Well, I guess I better sit down and make my New Year Resolutions so I can just break them in a couple of weeks."
Now, before I start to tell you my opinion about this, let me first clarify that I think working on being a better person is very important. Part of the reason why we are here on this earth is for self mastery.
However, I have a different opinion than most people do about how to get to self mastery. Might not be right for some people, but it works really well for me. I believe instead of trying to constantly set new goals and then breaking them (which starts a horrible and destructive self criticism cycle), it is more important to look at what I have ALREADY accomplished.
At the beginning of this 2014 year, I am enjoying what I accomplished for 2013. Looking at this list of what I HAVE accomplished, how I have grown from it, what I have learned, and especially how the Lord's grace has helped me along the way, it gives me SO MUCH more motivation to go into 2014 with high hopes.
Here is some of my "Accomplished" list:
-Moved to a new area. I have met new friends, have wonderful new neighbors, my kids have great friends.
-Lost a lot of my baby weight! I ate raw for a month, put a group together and helped other people while I worked on this.
-Loved my kids. There were many times of irritation, but I did my best with being their mom this year, loving them and teaching them. They are amazing people and souls. I prayed with them, I hugged them, I laughed with them.
-Loved my husband. We grew closer together, we are talking even more now than we did when we were dating.
-Prayed for grace and deliverance all the time to make up for my weaknesses. My relationship with the Lord went to another level.
-Started a new business. Signed our first client before our website was even live!
-Served my family for a month during the summer. Was able to get my natural medicine cabinet made and educated myself more on being Dr. Mom.
When I go through all my pictures from the year and take inventory of what HAS happened and what I HAVE done, then I have the courage and excitement to face this new year. I give myself permission to say,"I don't need just a few New Year's resolutions to make myself feel like this year is going to be great! I just need to look back at the past year and see that my life IS GREAT."
This is what I want you to remember throughout your life... Look at what you ARE doing, not what you are "supposed" to be doing. Look at the people you ARE loving, not those you haven't been able to. Look at the good habits you ALREADY have, not those you don't. Look at the talents you ARE giving to those around you, not wishing for something that is someone else's talent.
The New Year is about patting yourself on the back. It is about being excited to grow a little more, to be a little better...Then when you look back you will see (through the help of the Lord) that you didn't just grow a little, you grew tremendously . You didn't just become a little better, you became much better. A few New Year resolutions aren't going to lead you to self mastery, what you ARE DOING now is how that is happening.
What you focus on expands. Good or bad. Focusing on what you have accomplished will give you more energy to do even more.
I love you,
Your Mom
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Saturday, December 21, 2013
How Can Homosexuality & Christianity Work? Come Ask My Family.
Dear Kids,
A few recent happenings in the media have brought up A LOT of heated emotions about homosexuality and Christianity. I wish EVERYONE telling their opinions on each side could have a view of our family about 20 years ago.
While I was a teenager in a small town of Idaho the news came out that I had two uncles who were gay. If the world thinks it is a big deal to "come out" now, well you should have seen the world about 20 years ago. These uncles are my dad's, your Papa's, brothers.
The upheaval that happened in our family, from my teenage lenses of the world, was just crazy. The news came out in the small town's newspaper and TV media about my uncles, but didn't name them specifically. My grandparents told their story and their opinions on the matter. I even remember in church one day being by my dad and having someone say to him, "So are you one of the those who are gay?"
Needless to say, our family learned years ago about the hate that can come up because of this argument. Maybe that is why I am just quiet a lot of times when my friends debate over which side is right and which side isn't. It's also why I think it is ridiculous for the cyber world to be so hateful on BOTH sides of the equation. It's because our family had to go through the processing much earlier than most people, and because of that I am very firmly rooted in my beliefs about it all.
But the point is...
It is interesting to look back and see the ebb's and flow's inside of the family's dynamics. A little "mini example" of what the world is doing with it right now. There were times of fighting. There were times of loving. There were times of acceptance. There were times of debate. There were times of major denial. There were times of tears. There were many times of confusion and trying to understand how to handle it all. Your Papa had countless family meetings with all of us about the whole thing. We read scriptures, we debated, we talked, we tried to sort it all out.
I wish the world could have a look at our family now. We love each other. We accept each other. BUT we don't always agree with each other. Everyone in our family has VERY different opinions on the philosophical, political and religious discussions about homosexuality and Christianity. Believe me, we have covered them ALL. But you know what matters 20 years later?
What matters is that I hug everyone in my family no matter what opinions they have and how different their opinions are from mine, and they hug me back. What matters is my dad speaks highly of his family, no matter what their beliefs are and if they are in line with his or not. What matters is that my grandparents have done the best job they know how to keep their family together.
What matters is no matter how liberal or conservative our views are, and there are VAST opinions around our extended family dinner table, in the end our hearts are open to each other. We have come to the point where we KNOW our different opinions on the subject, and there is no more room for debate. There is only room for love and moving on with our lives.
I believe it is a miracle that my father's family is intact and love each other. There is a big difference between how "Cyber Life" treats this subject and "Real Life" treats it. Our family has proven this is the case. We make it work. We treat each other as Christ would.
So, kids, remember that I love you. In our family we will teach you the principles that we believe about this whole issue, and then you will get your free agency to do the same.
I love you,
Your Mom
A few recent happenings in the media have brought up A LOT of heated emotions about homosexuality and Christianity. I wish EVERYONE telling their opinions on each side could have a view of our family about 20 years ago.
While I was a teenager in a small town of Idaho the news came out that I had two uncles who were gay. If the world thinks it is a big deal to "come out" now, well you should have seen the world about 20 years ago. These uncles are my dad's, your Papa's, brothers.
The upheaval that happened in our family, from my teenage lenses of the world, was just crazy. The news came out in the small town's newspaper and TV media about my uncles, but didn't name them specifically. My grandparents told their story and their opinions on the matter. I even remember in church one day being by my dad and having someone say to him, "So are you one of the those who are gay?"
Needless to say, our family learned years ago about the hate that can come up because of this argument. Maybe that is why I am just quiet a lot of times when my friends debate over which side is right and which side isn't. It's also why I think it is ridiculous for the cyber world to be so hateful on BOTH sides of the equation. It's because our family had to go through the processing much earlier than most people, and because of that I am very firmly rooted in my beliefs about it all.
But the point is...
It is interesting to look back and see the ebb's and flow's inside of the family's dynamics. A little "mini example" of what the world is doing with it right now. There were times of fighting. There were times of loving. There were times of acceptance. There were times of debate. There were times of major denial. There were times of tears. There were many times of confusion and trying to understand how to handle it all. Your Papa had countless family meetings with all of us about the whole thing. We read scriptures, we debated, we talked, we tried to sort it all out.
I wish the world could have a look at our family now. We love each other. We accept each other. BUT we don't always agree with each other. Everyone in our family has VERY different opinions on the philosophical, political and religious discussions about homosexuality and Christianity. Believe me, we have covered them ALL. But you know what matters 20 years later?
What matters is that I hug everyone in my family no matter what opinions they have and how different their opinions are from mine, and they hug me back. What matters is my dad speaks highly of his family, no matter what their beliefs are and if they are in line with his or not. What matters is that my grandparents have done the best job they know how to keep their family together.
What matters is no matter how liberal or conservative our views are, and there are VAST opinions around our extended family dinner table, in the end our hearts are open to each other. We have come to the point where we KNOW our different opinions on the subject, and there is no more room for debate. There is only room for love and moving on with our lives.
I believe it is a miracle that my father's family is intact and love each other. There is a big difference between how "Cyber Life" treats this subject and "Real Life" treats it. Our family has proven this is the case. We make it work. We treat each other as Christ would.
So, kids, remember that I love you. In our family we will teach you the principles that we believe about this whole issue, and then you will get your free agency to do the same.
I love you,
Your Mom
Friday, December 20, 2013
I Just Want A Hug
Dear Gabriel,
You came out of quiet time today a little bit early. You just stood and looked at me. I asked,"Do you need anything? A book? A blanket?"
Then you said, "No, I just want a hug."
I opened my arms extended to you, and you ran to me.
You have to understand that this is a great moment because you are NOT a touchy boy. You don't like it when I try and stroke your back. You don't like it when I try and cuddle with you. Physical touch is not your love language. So to be able to hug you and just hug you some more while you sat on my lap, that is a pretty good day.
I love you, and you can always ask me for a hug.
Your Mom
You came out of quiet time today a little bit early. You just stood and looked at me. I asked,"Do you need anything? A book? A blanket?"
Then you said, "No, I just want a hug."
I opened my arms extended to you, and you ran to me.
You have to understand that this is a great moment because you are NOT a touchy boy. You don't like it when I try and stroke your back. You don't like it when I try and cuddle with you. Physical touch is not your love language. So to be able to hug you and just hug you some more while you sat on my lap, that is a pretty good day.
I love you, and you can always ask me for a hug.
Your Mom
I Am Special, Because I'm Great
Dear Natalia,
Do you want to know what makes me super happy? Hearing you singing, in your room, by yourself and with your own melody, these words:
"I am special, because I'm great. Jesus loves me. I am talented and my life is awesome. My brother sometimes hits me, but I still love him and my baby Elijah takes my things, but I can share."
You are singing this over and over again, especially the first line,"I am special, because I'm great. Jesus loves me."
Just keep up singing those words. You are special. You are great. And Jesus does love you. Remember those things in your life, and you will pretty much do wonderfully.
I love you,
Your Mom
Do you want to know what makes me super happy? Hearing you singing, in your room, by yourself and with your own melody, these words:
"I am special, because I'm great. Jesus loves me. I am talented and my life is awesome. My brother sometimes hits me, but I still love him and my baby Elijah takes my things, but I can share."
You are singing this over and over again, especially the first line,"I am special, because I'm great. Jesus loves me."
Just keep up singing those words. You are special. You are great. And Jesus does love you. Remember those things in your life, and you will pretty much do wonderfully.
I love you,
Your Mom
Christmas Confessions
Dear Kids,
Christmas Truth Time =
I don't do Christmas cards. Why? Because I was standing over a table full of cards (about 5 years ago) and I started crying because I had no idea how to get all the addresses of people that I was 'supposed' to send cards to for them to be on time. I asked myself, "Am I sending these cards because I am 'supposed' to? Or because I really want to?"
I had my answer. I was doing it out of social pressure. So I quit.
I don't do fancy neighbor gifts. There have been many seasons when I have slaved over making gifts that were so cute, so creative, so imaginative. A couple Christmas's ago I had a friend give me a simple chocolate orange with a heart felt letter. Her words meant more to me than anything she could have made.
I had my answer. No more fancy things that people won't remember who it came from. Now I do simple, as simple as possible (chocolate oranges are my favorite) and I give VERY sincere hugs and words with it.
I don't do hustle and bustle of shopping. I go to stores and do my shopping at 10pm once, maybe twice, and get it all done in a big spree. I don't do guilt of what I am 'supposed' to be doing at Christmas. I don't decorate every room. I don't do crazy fancy things counting down. I don't do every Christmas party.
I do sing Christmas carols with you every night, accapella, while we snuggle. I do read one Christmas story every night before bed. I do leave surprises from "Candy Cane Charlie" (our elf - but only little surprises like a pez dispenser with a note that says, "You are amazing, love CCC"). I do talk about Christ while we sit and look at our tree. I do let you watch a Christmas movie everyday. I do service for one family we choose each year. I do LOVE watching bright eyes on Christmas morning.
In our home, I have vowed to not allow myself to be crazy this time of year. If I don't feel like doing something, I don't. If I feel like I am "supposed" to do something, I don't. If I feel a sincere desire and burning in my heart to go talk to my neighbor and give them a Christmas hug, I do. If I feel a sincere desire to make fun cookies, I do. If I feel a sincere desire to hang out in my pajamas all day, I do. December is for our family to be closer and for the rest of the world to fade away.
That is the Christmas Truth in our home.
I love you,
Your Mom
Christmas Truth Time =
I don't do Christmas cards. Why? Because I was standing over a table full of cards (about 5 years ago) and I started crying because I had no idea how to get all the addresses of people that I was 'supposed' to send cards to for them to be on time. I asked myself, "Am I sending these cards because I am 'supposed' to? Or because I really want to?"
I had my answer. I was doing it out of social pressure. So I quit.
I don't do fancy neighbor gifts. There have been many seasons when I have slaved over making gifts that were so cute, so creative, so imaginative. A couple Christmas's ago I had a friend give me a simple chocolate orange with a heart felt letter. Her words meant more to me than anything she could have made.
I had my answer. No more fancy things that people won't remember who it came from. Now I do simple, as simple as possible (chocolate oranges are my favorite) and I give VERY sincere hugs and words with it.
I don't do hustle and bustle of shopping. I go to stores and do my shopping at 10pm once, maybe twice, and get it all done in a big spree. I don't do guilt of what I am 'supposed' to be doing at Christmas. I don't decorate every room. I don't do crazy fancy things counting down. I don't do every Christmas party.
I do sing Christmas carols with you every night, accapella, while we snuggle. I do read one Christmas story every night before bed. I do leave surprises from "Candy Cane Charlie" (our elf - but only little surprises like a pez dispenser with a note that says, "You are amazing, love CCC"). I do talk about Christ while we sit and look at our tree. I do let you watch a Christmas movie everyday. I do service for one family we choose each year. I do LOVE watching bright eyes on Christmas morning.
In our home, I have vowed to not allow myself to be crazy this time of year. If I don't feel like doing something, I don't. If I feel like I am "supposed" to do something, I don't. If I feel a sincere desire and burning in my heart to go talk to my neighbor and give them a Christmas hug, I do. If I feel a sincere desire to make fun cookies, I do. If I feel a sincere desire to hang out in my pajamas all day, I do. December is for our family to be closer and for the rest of the world to fade away.
That is the Christmas Truth in our home.
I love you,
Your Mom
Friday, December 13, 2013
Updates with Natalia
Dear Natalia,
I love your capacity. At three years old you are doing and saying things like this (with these kind of full sentences):
"Mom, I will put those away (the silverware)."
"Gabe, don't worry, I will get your coat."
"Mom, Elijah has something in his mouth, will you get it please?"
I mention, "Gabe you need to get your shoes!" and then YOU go get them and place his shoes in front of him.
"But mom, we need to say personal prayers! Right now!"
There are so many things you do and say that just amaze me. You are 3 going on 30. Seriously. I am excited to see what you are going to do in your life.
You are strong. You have come here with natural self esteem. You are going to rock the world.
I love you,
Your Mom
I love your capacity. At three years old you are doing and saying things like this (with these kind of full sentences):
"Mom, I will put those away (the silverware)."
"Gabe, don't worry, I will get your coat."
"Mom, Elijah has something in his mouth, will you get it please?"
I mention, "Gabe you need to get your shoes!" and then YOU go get them and place his shoes in front of him.
"But mom, we need to say personal prayers! Right now!"
There are so many things you do and say that just amaze me. You are 3 going on 30. Seriously. I am excited to see what you are going to do in your life.
You are strong. You have come here with natural self esteem. You are going to rock the world.
I love you,
Your Mom
Mom Is The Place
Dear Elijah,
Tonight you went to a friends house while your dad and I took your siblings on a date to a movie.
When we got back to the house to pick you up, as soon as you saw me you started to cry and walk as fast as your little legs to carry you to my arms. The girl babysitting said, "Andrea, I promise he has been just fine the whole time until seeing you!"
Feedback like this used to bother me, until a little while ago.
It reminded me of a conversation I had with my mom (your Mimi). Something similar happened with Natalia, when she was with someone else and was fine until she saw me. Then she just cried and had to have hug after hug.
After telling Mimi of this situation and trying to figure out why that happened, she said, "Oh, can I tell you something? It never goes away. Look what you are doing right now! You are expressing your emotion to me and needing as much feedback as possible. How many times has something happened to you as an adult and you act just fine until you talk to mom about it? How often do you stay strong until the moment that you talk to mom and break down and cry? It doesn't stop, I assure you."
It is true! I used to feel like if my kids are fine until they see me, and then they cry, that something was wrong. But I have changed my opinion about that. It just means that mom is the safe place. Mom is the place to cry. Mom is the place to lean on. Mom is the place to emotionally throw up. Mom is the place for all of that.
So, I am sure this will happen with you again. But that is okay. Because mom is the place where you can go.
I love you,
Your Mom
Tonight you went to a friends house while your dad and I took your siblings on a date to a movie.
When we got back to the house to pick you up, as soon as you saw me you started to cry and walk as fast as your little legs to carry you to my arms. The girl babysitting said, "Andrea, I promise he has been just fine the whole time until seeing you!"
Feedback like this used to bother me, until a little while ago.
It reminded me of a conversation I had with my mom (your Mimi). Something similar happened with Natalia, when she was with someone else and was fine until she saw me. Then she just cried and had to have hug after hug.
After telling Mimi of this situation and trying to figure out why that happened, she said, "Oh, can I tell you something? It never goes away. Look what you are doing right now! You are expressing your emotion to me and needing as much feedback as possible. How many times has something happened to you as an adult and you act just fine until you talk to mom about it? How often do you stay strong until the moment that you talk to mom and break down and cry? It doesn't stop, I assure you."
So, I am sure this will happen with you again. But that is okay. Because mom is the place where you can go.
I love you,
Your Mom
The Nativity Was Cancelled
Dear Gabriel,
Your soft heart is amazing to me.
Tonight we were supposed to go and actually be in a live nativity production. I had been telling you about it all day. I told you we were going to be part of "telling the story of Jesus to people". I described being on stage and we were going to be together for it all. You were so excited about it and kept talking about "telling the story of Jesus".
As we were heading out the door we got a call telling us it was cancelled. There was a line that broke close to the stage and there were terrible ice problems that couldn't be fixed before the production.
When I knelt and told you about it you just looked at me and started to tear up. With your perfect expressions of feeling in your eyes you said, "But mom... I have to tell the story of Jesus!" You collapsed in my arms and just cried for about 10 minutes. You were heart broken!
I let you cry and talk to me about it. I told you again what happened and tried to describe it so your five year old mind could understand it all.
It was just amazing to me how significant it all was to you. It was such an amazing reminder of how important things are to children! To me as an adult, I find out something like this and I am sad, but I move on pretty quickly. But remembering what it means to you and your tender heart... Such a great reminder of making sure to remember your viewpoint of the importance of little things.
I love you and your tender heart so much. It will be a great asset to you as you grow and grow.
Your Mom
Your soft heart is amazing to me.
Tonight we were supposed to go and actually be in a live nativity production. I had been telling you about it all day. I told you we were going to be part of "telling the story of Jesus to people". I described being on stage and we were going to be together for it all. You were so excited about it and kept talking about "telling the story of Jesus".
As we were heading out the door we got a call telling us it was cancelled. There was a line that broke close to the stage and there were terrible ice problems that couldn't be fixed before the production.
When I knelt and told you about it you just looked at me and started to tear up. With your perfect expressions of feeling in your eyes you said, "But mom... I have to tell the story of Jesus!" You collapsed in my arms and just cried for about 10 minutes. You were heart broken!
I let you cry and talk to me about it. I told you again what happened and tried to describe it so your five year old mind could understand it all.
It was just amazing to me how significant it all was to you. It was such an amazing reminder of how important things are to children! To me as an adult, I find out something like this and I am sad, but I move on pretty quickly. But remembering what it means to you and your tender heart... Such a great reminder of making sure to remember your viewpoint of the importance of little things.
I love you and your tender heart so much. It will be a great asset to you as you grow and grow.
Your Mom
Saturday, December 7, 2013
Juggling
Dear Kids,
I have had quite a few friends either mention this frustration or talk with me about it lately. Holidays ALWAYS bring these thoughts and feelings on because of extra stuff that needs to be done. The frustration is this:
How do you get everything done? Please tell me how you stay organized, calm, and remain "in balance"!
Here is the truth: I don't. And I don't believe anyone does.
Here is the challenge: Being able to embrace "juggling" life and not be hard on yourself when life tends to be crazy.
I had a great chance to be mentored by Elder Bednar about this very thing a while ago. He is the most organized and accomplished man I have personally ever met and known. Someone asked him in a group once how he was able to "balance" everything so perfectly. He LAUGHED OUT LOUD.
He looked at that person and just said, "There is no such thing as balancing everything perfectly. You have to get rid of that false expectation. It does not exist. Think of life like juggling. You are throwing balls in the air and catching them over and over again. What I have found that works for me is to focus on catching the ball that is dropping, give my energy to what that is and then when it is on the up swing and in the air again I let it go and leave it alone. Then focus on the next ball that is dropping...
"Just remember that your relationship with the Lord is NEVER one of those balls that you are juggling. Your relationship with the Lord is your hands."
I think about this counsel often when I experience days that are unbalanced, stressful, hard, and pushing me to my limits. Have I truly taken the time to have a strong relationship with my Father? Most of the time I find, for me anyway, when I am going crazy, that it is my hands that need the work. Once they are strong, then I know exactly how to handle juggling the balls and where to focus first.
You are all great examples to me of keeping my soul alive. You live in your soul everyday, so when I stop and take a breath of your perfect spirits, then I remember how to have a true relationship with God. We are all children in His eyes and He is always ready to hug and love us when our days are crazy.
I love you,
Your Mom
I have had quite a few friends either mention this frustration or talk with me about it lately. Holidays ALWAYS bring these thoughts and feelings on because of extra stuff that needs to be done. The frustration is this:
How do you get everything done? Please tell me how you stay organized, calm, and remain "in balance"!
Here is the truth: I don't. And I don't believe anyone does.
Here is the challenge: Being able to embrace "juggling" life and not be hard on yourself when life tends to be crazy.
I had a great chance to be mentored by Elder Bednar about this very thing a while ago. He is the most organized and accomplished man I have personally ever met and known. Someone asked him in a group once how he was able to "balance" everything so perfectly. He LAUGHED OUT LOUD.
He looked at that person and just said, "There is no such thing as balancing everything perfectly. You have to get rid of that false expectation. It does not exist. Think of life like juggling. You are throwing balls in the air and catching them over and over again. What I have found that works for me is to focus on catching the ball that is dropping, give my energy to what that is and then when it is on the up swing and in the air again I let it go and leave it alone. Then focus on the next ball that is dropping...
"Just remember that your relationship with the Lord is NEVER one of those balls that you are juggling. Your relationship with the Lord is your hands."
I think about this counsel often when I experience days that are unbalanced, stressful, hard, and pushing me to my limits. Have I truly taken the time to have a strong relationship with my Father? Most of the time I find, for me anyway, when I am going crazy, that it is my hands that need the work. Once they are strong, then I know exactly how to handle juggling the balls and where to focus first.
You are all great examples to me of keeping my soul alive. You live in your soul everyday, so when I stop and take a breath of your perfect spirits, then I remember how to have a true relationship with God. We are all children in His eyes and He is always ready to hug and love us when our days are crazy.
I love you,
Your Mom
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Lessons From Stressful Days
Dear Kids,
I am irritated with all of you today. Not proud of it. But it is the truth.
Today was a hard mom day. I allowed everything to irritate me from the time I woke up. I feel like I have so much piling up around me. I don't have time to get everything done. I was irritated with everything around me, especially all of you, because with everything going on the last thing I was able to cope with were three little kids shouting at me all day long. I have eight loads of laundry to fold. I have dishes piled up in the sink. I need to desperately clean the toilets before something grows and jumps out of them. I have to write a couple articles. I need to follow up on some client work. Holiday to-dos are starting to stare me in the face.
But, most of all, I just need to calm down and breathe a little bit. All of you reacted to my "state of being". You have been disobedient and testing my buttons constantly. Everything you have done today has been in reaction to my emotional state. As the saying goes, "Mom is the heart of the home". I believe that. When my heart beats with irritations or fears, our home beats with them as well. When my heart beats with love and happiness, our home beats with them.
I firmly believe in the principle that I AFFECT MY ATMOSPHERE. I am in charge of what I feel, think and do.
So tonight I did what any logical parent does at the end of a long day and put on a movie for you. I thought I better find the lesson inside of all the emotion today.
I have not been putting first things first. Because of this I have not had a full bucket to draw from in order to react with love and happiness. My soul hasn't been fed really well for a while. I need to eat better. I haven't been going to bed on time for quite a few nights. I haven't been 'on my game' for a couple of weeks. It is time to do some 'soul inventory' and readjust a bit.
The most important thing is that you feel my love. It doesn't matter how much is on my list. It doesn't matter how dirty my house is. It doesn't matter how much I need to do. The most important thing is LOVING YOU.
So tomorrow love is the first thing on my 'list'. Wake up with love. Make breakfast with love. Go to appointments with love. I know from experience that when I allow love in my heart instead of irritation, I get things done 10x as fast and efficient.
The lesson is: When I put first things first, there is a miracle that happens. The miracle is everything falls into place perfectly. Everything will get done with peace instead of anger or irritation.
The movie is almost over in the other room and I am preparing myself to have the energy I need to give you a bath and put you to bed... but with a smile on my face and love in my heart. Even with the hard day, I can and I am choosing to end it so you remember as you go to sleep that your mom kissed your cheek, snuggled with you and loved you.
Always put first things first! Always! It makes the biggest difference in your whole life and day.
Even when I am off my game - remember that I always love you.
Your Mom
I am irritated with all of you today. Not proud of it. But it is the truth.
Today was a hard mom day. I allowed everything to irritate me from the time I woke up. I feel like I have so much piling up around me. I don't have time to get everything done. I was irritated with everything around me, especially all of you, because with everything going on the last thing I was able to cope with were three little kids shouting at me all day long. I have eight loads of laundry to fold. I have dishes piled up in the sink. I need to desperately clean the toilets before something grows and jumps out of them. I have to write a couple articles. I need to follow up on some client work. Holiday to-dos are starting to stare me in the face.
But, most of all, I just need to calm down and breathe a little bit. All of you reacted to my "state of being". You have been disobedient and testing my buttons constantly. Everything you have done today has been in reaction to my emotional state. As the saying goes, "Mom is the heart of the home". I believe that. When my heart beats with irritations or fears, our home beats with them as well. When my heart beats with love and happiness, our home beats with them.
I firmly believe in the principle that I AFFECT MY ATMOSPHERE. I am in charge of what I feel, think and do.
So tonight I did what any logical parent does at the end of a long day and put on a movie for you. I thought I better find the lesson inside of all the emotion today.
I have not been putting first things first. Because of this I have not had a full bucket to draw from in order to react with love and happiness. My soul hasn't been fed really well for a while. I need to eat better. I haven't been going to bed on time for quite a few nights. I haven't been 'on my game' for a couple of weeks. It is time to do some 'soul inventory' and readjust a bit.
The most important thing is that you feel my love. It doesn't matter how much is on my list. It doesn't matter how dirty my house is. It doesn't matter how much I need to do. The most important thing is LOVING YOU.
So tomorrow love is the first thing on my 'list'. Wake up with love. Make breakfast with love. Go to appointments with love. I know from experience that when I allow love in my heart instead of irritation, I get things done 10x as fast and efficient.
The lesson is: When I put first things first, there is a miracle that happens. The miracle is everything falls into place perfectly. Everything will get done with peace instead of anger or irritation.
The movie is almost over in the other room and I am preparing myself to have the energy I need to give you a bath and put you to bed... but with a smile on my face and love in my heart. Even with the hard day, I can and I am choosing to end it so you remember as you go to sleep that your mom kissed your cheek, snuggled with you and loved you.
Always put first things first! Always! It makes the biggest difference in your whole life and day.
Even when I am off my game - remember that I always love you.
Your Mom
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