Just Needed A Little Time

Dear Elijah,

Last night you woke up all of a sudden just screaming.

Dad went in and tried to comfort you and put you back down. You didn't like that at all. We didn't want to give you a bottle, because for the last couple of nights we have given you a bottle and we don't want to continue that habit.

So a little while I went in and took you and just snuggled in the chair and rocked you.

You snuggled into my shoulder. You would try to tell me something every once and awhile, looking up at me at the same time, and then you would place your head back down again. It was about 30 minutes of singing and snuggling. You didn't fall back asleep, but you settled down.

When I put you back down into your bed you went right to sleep. It was one of those moments when I could feel that you just needed to talk and you couldn't, so you wanted to be close for a little while. You weren't sick, you weren't physically aching, but you were emotionally and spiritually aching. Perhaps aching for home? I know you miss it up there.

It was wonderful time for me too because I realized how much I haven't taken the time to snuggle with you. It was so much easier with the other two being the oldest. But you haven't gotten that time with me.

So I promised myself I would snuggle with you and spend more specific time with you to fill up your bucket more. Just being a year old, and I can feel that is something I will need to be very aware of.

I love you,

Your Mom