Seeing Some Fruits Of Motherhood

Dear Kids,

I'm really noticing the "fruits of motherhood" in the last little while.

We have had a lot going on. We just moved a couple weeks ago while I was 8 months pregnant. There was a night a couple weeks before the move that was really scary. I cramped up and started contracting really bad. I had done "too much" that day around the house trying to get things ready, and I really paid for it that night. I was scared and worried about the baby staying in and cooking a little longer.

Realizing that I couldn't do as much as I normally can, I started relying on you to help me a lot more. You have all been good about doing "chores" and getting the normal routine done, but during this move while I haven't been able to do very much, you have REALLY stepped up to the plate. Gabe packed a ton of the storage room, Talia packed up all the books in the house, and Elijah did a lot of little helper things constantly.

It has been a stressful couple of months, and all of you have had to really put up with "momster" sometimes instead of a happier mom. But you have done it. You have really showed me so many fruits of motherhood. When I sit back and watch you and think about everything you ARE doing right and everything that IS going well around us, I can't help but cry thinking about how all my hard work has been worth it! I was the one who taught you how to clean up, how to vacuum, how to do dishes, how to talk to each other, how to work as a team, how to read, how to work, how to do soooooo many things. And now, during this time when I need it the most, you are giving all of that hard work back to me.

I want to jump up and down and shout, "It's worth it! This motherhood thing... it's really worth it! Something is working and it's worth all the hard work and frustration!"

Once again, in the last 24 hours I have had to start relying on you more. I have started cramping up and contracting a bunch, more than is comfortable for 3-4 weeks out on having this baby. So I am on bed rest. I am taking it easy, I am truly doing NOTHING that requires any kind of physical energy. Mimi and Papa ended up taking Elijah for a couple of weeks (which is a huge blessing right now). We are missing each other already, but both of you, Gabe and Talia, have stepped up to the plate with what is needed and helping with all the little things.

I am amazed at you and I am so privileged to be your mother. You are all such amazing souls, you have so much light, so much goodness, so much talent, so much inside of you to share with the world. I can only hope that I can help to mentor that the best I know how and then Heavenly Father will make up the difference for me and you.

We will get through this one too! Sooner than later we will be on the other side of this baby adventure, and we will have a new brother to add to our family. We will be moving forward and growing together, and another adventure will come along that we will need to tackle together. And it will keep going like that until we are done with this life. There will be constant things that will keep coming up and keep happening, but that is why we have a family, that is why we are here together is because we can help each other through it. Just like my family, my mom and dad, my siblings help to make up the difference (like Uncle J taking Elijah to Idaho), I hope to pass that onto you as well, to help each other and support each other.

But my heart is so happy to be seeing some of those "fruits of motherhood" already in moments like this. I'm so grateful for it!

I love you,

Your Mom