People Waking Up

 Dear Kids, 

The world is crazy right now. There is so much happening!

Covid-19

Pysochological and Social Warfare 

Meteor Landing in New Mexico - 7500 acres burned

Riots in the Cities

Political Assault unlike ANYTHING I've Ever Seen!

I could go on and on and on and on and on about it all. 

But what is amazing is I am first hand seeing how the Lord is working on so many people right now. Brent and I in the last week have been invited to participate in FOUR different meetings of people who are feeling "the call" to move for something more, something different, more ZION. The phrase that is being used the most is people "being awake". 

Many people are "waking up" just in the last few months since Covid-19 hit. I really believe that the virus has been a HUGE tender mercy of God to get us awake and ready for things to come. Many people are bemoaning it, but I look at it as a huge blessing in this way!

I have had a lot of realizations and understandings in the last little while. I wrote previously about being attacked by Satan SO MUCH, in a way that I hadn't experienced before. I'm so grateful to have that behind me - but in reality I know it was just to start to fine tune me for what else is going to be coming our way. It's going to get bad. How bad, I don't know - but I know it is going to be really hard. 

About eight years ago the Lord gave Brent a HUGE impression of a preparedness property, he could see it in his mind and he received very specific direction about this property. Ever since then we've been wanting that and wanting to invite it into our lives and into our stewardships. 

Well, now time has passed and we've dreamed of it and wanted it, but it hasn't happened. We haven't been given a stewardship big enough to start on that dream of ours. Just this last Sunday Brent and I were talking about everything coming down the pike - everything with government control that is going to be happening and all the things. I started getting REALLY emotional. It put me into a tail spin for the entire day - full of sadness and sorrow that for whatever reason we weren't given that stewardship in order to follow through on that impression that Brent received so specifically. 

I cried and cried. I felt so heavy with sorrow just saying, "I'm sorry Father, for whatever we did that caused it so we couldn't be trusted with that stewardship. I'm so sorry! Now here we are looking at this freight train coming at us and we aren't in the position to help more people! I'm so sorry."

It REALLY affected me. I didn't feel like I wanted to go into vain regret - but I did feel so sad. Sad. Godly sorrow really for not following through and for whatever we did that blocked it from coming to us. 

More than anything as I was feeling that sorrow I just said to the Lord, "I don't want to miss out on any other impressions! I don't want to have regret like this about other impressions that we give to us! Please keep purifying us! Please keep helping us!". 

I cried to Brent about it for a while Sunday night, feeling so sad. I know the Lord doesn't want me to go into darkness and stay there, but I had to repent. I asked the Lord to forgive me, forgive Brent and forgive us for our humanity and weakness. And I want to keep pleading for Him, that with whatever time and resources we have left, that we can help people. That we could possibly "still be counted worthy."

Time will tell as far as what responsibility could be put on our shoulders and what we are ready for, but I know I want to go before the Lord ready to do His will. 

that is the whole reason that I started homeschooling is because it was HIS WILL. I know that. I know that I have followed through on that impression, and even though I haven't done it 'perfectly', I know I have obeyed. 

So our next project is the podcasts. We must obey the voice of the spirit with the podcasts. That is the next step. and I can focus on that today. I have to realize what I can do TODAY. Then wrap my head around that. 

I love you kids. Please, hold onto the gospel. I don't know what the future holds. But hold on. Please. 

Your Mom

Just Thoughts About Our Path

 Dear Kids, 

Your dad and I have been on this journey of further spiritual growth and enlightenment. It's been happening for a while now, but intensified when we decided last December that we were going to meditate for 30 days every night. 

We had been meditating before then for quite a few years, but it wasn't as concentrated as this latest attempt. Your dad really felt like we needed to give uninterrupted time for meditation and so we did. That journey has led us spiritually to a totally different place. 

It's also fascinating because we started it with telestial motivations in mind, and the Lord in His mercy has moved our experiences to a completely different place with celestial motivations instead. 

I don't know if I could begin to describe the changes that have taken place, but they are marvelous and amazing. We have had manifestations of Christ in our lives, in our minds, in our hearts. Often I will feel Jesus come to me in these quiet moments and lift me. 

We have also felt for quite a while that we needed to do some Becoming Spiritually Centered Podcasts, based on what we had learned ourselves from the curriculum that Brother Cox put together so many years ago. That program has helped us in our daily application and interactions - those skills have been paramount to what we have personally gone through and experienced. 

We had the impression a couple years ago to do the podcast - but for various reasons it has kept being put off. We haven't made time for it or we couldn't come together on our thoughts and preparation about it - or any number of things that just happened because of life and kids and job and family and all the things. 

We have recently renewed our decision to do the podcasts. It has to happen. 

Specifically it has to be put together because we have recently been told that is the FIRST step to everything else that we are praying about and inviting into our lives. 

I love you kids, 

Your Mom

Flash Moment Vision Of Zion

 Dear Kids, 

I am filled to overflowing after this past conference weekend. 

I can't believe what an amazing time we live in. We keep getting told that we live in the very last of the last dispensation on the earth. 

I need to tell you about a flash vision experience I had while listening to Elder Eyering's talk, about how I and Natalia are the women who will usher in Zion and greet the city of Enoch. 

He specifically said those words. I am amazed by it. I was sitting in the chapel next to your Aunt Mesha and he said, "You sisters, your daughters and your granddaughters will be the ones who usher in Zion" and then (I'm paraphrasing here), "You will greet the city of Enoch when they come" and "You will live with the Savior there"...

I had a flash moment in my mind. I get these "flash visions" I call them. I used to discount them and minimize them as nothing super significant, but now I'm beginning to embrace them and understand that it is one of my spiritual gifts in order to testify of the Savior. They happen in a flash, but in those moments I am able to take in so much information as I am "given to understand".

I saw in my mind's eye the angels from the City of Enoch. I saw as I hugged them and was weeping because I had missed them so much. They are/were my associates in heaven! I proved myself in heaven long ago, and I can and will do so again here. The light that was there was just unbelievable. The sisters of the church were all around me, we were looking at each other in amazement and gratitude that we had made it! That we had seen this promise fulfilled and soaking in the grandeur of it all. 

I was zero in focused on what Eyering was saying, it was like tunnel vision. It HIT me with such power and magnitude. It's all that matters! In that moment I experienced a HUGE change of heart. And it's interesting because I didn't think I even needed that change of heart, but especially after this past six months of being attacked so viciously by Satan, I needed that boost. It was a laser like focus. 

Zion is ALL THAT MATTERS. It gave me a LAZER focus that all that matters is preparing my children for Zion. That's it. It gave me a laser like focus that I will testify of it to everyone that I can. I can and will perform my stewardship duties with aspects of my life, I know that I will keep being politically involved by calling my representatives and be involved in peaceful protesting. But getting emotionally involved in what is going on with politics? I don't have time for that. 

Zion is all I have time for. Zion is all I am willing to give my energy for. "Yes Armageddon is coming, but so is Adam-Ondi-Ahman" as Maxwell said. It renewed my passion for it! I didn't realize that I hadn't felt the EXCITEMENT of everything that is happening. I was only feeling the dread of all the awful. I was only feeling the gut understanding of the horrors going on in the world and all the people leaving. I was only feeling the weight of the sins of the world. I was only feeling that deep remorse for not knowing the timing and how I should focus my energy. 

In that flash moment of vision and understanding it took away all of that questioning, all of the fear, all of the doubt, all of the worry, all of the EVERYTHING. The glory I beheld was unlike anything I could imagine. The love I felt was exciting! IT was glorious! I could hardly breathe it all in!

I am a Zion Builder. Period. In everything I am doing, I am a Zion Builder and THAT is all that matters. 

Every question, every moment of doubt about anything I ask myself, "Build Zion. Period." That is what is going to get me through everything that is coming. 

Now, I want to receive revelation about how I need to do that within my family and my home. What that needs to specifically look like for all of YOU. For my children. With the system and rhythms in our home. 

How grateful I am for that moment of experience and moment of understanding. I received a blessing from your dad a couple months ago when he told me, 'You will have the privilege of running from house to house proclaiming "that Savior is coming back!". It is marvelous and beautiful!

I love you kids! I love that the Savior is coming back! I know He is coming back! And yes, it might be another 5-10 years of trials and tribulations, but HE IS COMING. 

I love you, 

Your Mom

YOU Will Usher In Zion

 Dear Kids, 

It is Saturday night, Oct. 3rd, 2020 and I just finished women's session of conference. Now I'm sitting on the couch, ready to go to bed, but I have to write a few of my impressions. 

We were told tonight that it is "you sisters, your daughters and your grand-daughters" that will usher in ZION. President Eyering gave a talk that just BLEW ME AWAY. I'm so grateful that I was able to hear it with my own two ears!

I am a witness to marvelous and miraculous happenings in the world and leading up to the Savior coming back to the earth! I can't believe it! It is just simply amazing. I want to scream it from the rooftops. 

All the talks this conference so far have been such food for my soul, and I can't even say how amazed I am at everything that we have been hearing. But Eyering's talk out of all of them was just phenomenal. You can't get much more blunt than how he said EVERYTHING. We are going to be ushering in Zion. Me. ME. Natalia. The women in OUR FAMILY. We are going to be ushering in Zion. I just can't even. 

The emotions are amazement, gratitude, surreal feelings, unbelievable, giddy, happiness and just CAN'T WAIT. I know there are a lot of hard times ahead of us. I know that. But that talk tonight was the boost that I needed in order to know that my impressions aren't off. I'm not crazy! I have been hearing the spirit about what is happening in the world and how everything is coming about and playing out. 

I don't know if I have the right words to describe everything. I actually know that I don't have the right words to describe everything. It is a feeling deep down in my soul that I have known about for a LONG TIME. We are going to be hugging and kissing those angels who come from the City of Enoch! ME! 

I'm so grateful for the validation of it all! I'm not crazy! My experiences are REAL. What I am feeling and experiencing is REAL. 

I have so many more thoughts and feelings, but my eyes are heavy so I will share tomorrow. But I had to record that I was here tonight! I heard it with my own TWO EARS! Jesus is coming back!

I love you kids, 

Your Mom