Dear Kids,
Today Gabriel was telling me about a little story that I wrote about him in my journal, many years ago. And as he was telling me this story I wrote down I realized, "I haven't written very many stories from our lives lately". Mainly thinking about the innocence of Joshua and how he is going to be growing out of that innocence very soon, and I haven't captured some of his stories lately.
So I want to tell you a story about Joshua.
Since he is the youngest, he is ALWAYS asking his older brothers and sister to play with him. Especially to play "Animals". Animals is a game that Gabe and Elijah have played for YEARS (Talia used to play it, but doesn't anymore). Joshua has learned the game from Gabe and Elijah, by watching them. And lately he has wanted to play his own game of Animals, as much as possible.
For days I heard him say, "Gabe, will you play animals with me?"... or "Elijah, will you play animals with me?"... then he started coming to me and saying, "Mom will you play animals with me?".
The answer to MOST of these requests from him were, "Not right now Joshy, I'm doing my school." Or "Not right now buddy, I'm finishing the dishes."
He started getting rejected ENOUGH that he was getting super, super sad. So I made up my mind that when he asked me again, I would tell him "yes!".
Joshua came up to me today and said, "mom will you play animals with me?" and I said, YES!!
He was all about that. Then he proceeded to play the game and just completely blew my mind. He remembered ALMOST EVERY DETAIL of getting ready to come here. In the game while replaying everything from his mind with his animals, he recounted what he packed, where we were, what we were doing, what he remembered, the airplane, where they stowed everything, waiting in lines, taking rides everywhere... SO MANY DETAILS.
It was amazing to me. I had the spirit tell me, "Andrea - he's always watching."
Just like all of you. You are ALWAYS WATCHING. It is easy for me to forget that. I get involved in "getting things done" everyday, so much so that I forget that we are creating engrained memories that are going to last a life time.
It is a happy thought and a crazy thought all at the same time. There are some things I don't want you to remember. But there are other things I want you to hold onto like crazy. The funny thing is, you will remember the most random things.
For example - I remember when I was about Talia's age and my mom was going through a homemaking course on some cassette tapes. She was listening to how to run a home better. I remember her listening to these tapes, and then one day when I was right behind her while she was walking down the hallway I distinctly remember her saying, "Paula, go back and pick that up off the ground."
There was a toy on the ground that she then turned around and she picked it up.
I have NO IDEA why it was THIS MEMORY that stuck with me, but it did. It has an impact on me. I remember being impacted by it. Now looking back I can put words as to the reason it impacted me. I now know that it affected me because she was doing her best. She wanted to take care of her home the best way she knew how. She was applying what she was learning. And I loved her for it.
So kids, I know you are going to remember things that will be random like that. But I hope that you can find the silver lining in all the memories. To remember that everything we did, it was because we loved you. We are learning, your dad and I, how to be parents. I hope you know that we are doing our best. And we LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
Thank you Joshua, for playing "Animals" with me today and reminding me of the little things. Yes we've done some pretty cool things in Mexico. But I secretly hope that one of the memories here for you is remembering your mom playing Animals with you.
I love you kids,
Your Mom
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