Dear Kids,
Just so you know - when God tells you something, just believe Him.
At the end of April I had the very distinct feeling to NOT make any kind of plans for the future. I thought he meant for a few months. I thought He meant no plans for maybe the fall. I thought He meant that maybe no classes over the summer. He has been prepping me for all this change for a while now. He told me I shouldn't be on the homeschooling retreat committee for Sept anymore. He told me not to plan anything after the retreat in April. He told me not to sign up to teach the Quest class, but I just wanted to make sure to be where my kids where. But I have had to cancel that. He has been giving me hints of having "no plans" for the future for the last little while.
Then after fasting for God to open the doors and windows for us to have the changes come into our lives that we need for Brent's work, for our future finances, for our children, for our refinement, He has caused us to move.
But while we are in this process we are feeling more and more that we will be a traveling family for a little while. We are still trying to figure out what that means and looks like. We're still trying to figure out if that means out of the country or RVing around the US for a little bit. But one thing is for sure... He is SHEDDING everything in our lives right now.
He is telling us to get rid of EVERYTHING. To sell everything we can, to get a very little storage unit for the non-sellable things (like memory books and stuff), to let go of ALL our attachments and only hold onto Him.
So today as I'm emptying out shelves and taking pictures of things to sell, I am feeling REALLY vulnerable. Really vulnerable. We are getting rid of everything! It feels freeing and really scary all at the same time.
But whenever I have the feelings of being "unearthed" and moved and shaken up a bit, I test it to see if we are on track. I think to myself, "Maybe we should just find another house here and move into it and ride it out some more." Anytime I look at another rental house or situation, it isn't right AT ALL. Not at all. God doesn't want us to rent anymore. And part of it is because I told Him that when we moved out of this house, I didn't want to rent anymore, I wanted to have our own space and house.
Well, we aren't at the point to have a house yet, but He is still moving us forward in our long term investment plans and opportunities.
We went camping this last week and He was teaching me the whole time while we were out there. "In the mornings, you will want to go and adventure and explore. In the afternoons, you will want to come back, have lunch, listen to some audiobooks, and do school work, then it will be dinner time and time with dad when he gets back from where he needs to be." He gave me a flash vision in my mind about giving all the storage we could to Dani and then getting rid of all the canned food and other food that is not as long term and giving it away. He showed it to me in my mind.
He showed me we will be coming back here someday, I don't know if that means 6 months or if that means years, but we will be back. I had that vision when I was driving down the boulevard that I already wrote about. I was driving down boulevard and I had a flash as if I was driving down the boulevard after we had been away for a while, we hadn't been here for a bit and it was like I was driving down the boulevard getting acquainted with everything again. I hadn't seen my friends for a while and there were things that were different.
So, yes, we are going through major change right now. God is showing us what to do. He wants us to shed EVERYTHING, have the 'urge to purge' and get rid of everything that we can and move forward with other things in our lives. I think it means we will have an RV for a while. And I also think it means that we might be living overseas for a bit as well. Crazy to think about all of that. It's a lot of change.
I feel like I am deeply breathing through all of it A LOT. It feels like a lot. It doesn't feel heavy or wrong, just that there is a lot to do. But the more I have planted this seed in my heart and mind about being non-permanent for a little while, the more right it is - even though shedding everything is interesting.
Just today when I was packing up a drawer in my bedroom I was deeply breathing through putting everything in boxes and not knowing when I was going to get them back out again. I was deep breathing while realizing that we are going majorly into minimalist living and it feels scary, right, good, and like A LOT. I have forgotten how much stability there is in "stuff" and God wants us to only rely on Him for the next little while, without the stuff, and without a personal place to "lay our heads."
Now kids, just know when you read this in the future, that your dad is working and taking care of us. We have the money that we could move into another rental and just pay month to month payments. But it isn't right to do it anymore. So we are going to go into the darkness and accept the fact that God knows EXACTLY where we wants us to be.
I love you, and I know I will look back on my life and see this as another major turning point in our road of dedicating our lives to Him.
I love you,
Your Mom
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