Dear Kids,
There was an experience I need to tell you about while I haven't been feeling well.
Your Papa and I got sick with (I think) the most recent Covid bug. We didn't get tested but had all the symptoms. We have both had it before, luckily we have anti-bodies to help with the process. But for a few days I REALLY didn't feel well at all.
I was achy all over my body, it felt like my body was hurting from a fever but I never really had a fever, just aches and pains all over my joints and muscles. It was just miserable. I had a cough and got ahead of the cough part of it luckily. Nothing ever accumulated in my lungs too much. It was the fatigue and aches and pains that were the worst.
It started the Tuesday before Grandma Kvarfordts graveside service. It felt yucky, but I was functional. Then Wednesday was her graveside and I was starting to feel the fatigue. Thursday I felt awful, Friday and Saturday were the worst. Kalea was there and helped to doctor me up on Wednesday, Mesha helped me on Thursday and Friday.
I didn't go to church on Sunday and I went and took a bath. I just sat there in the tub and was praying to feel better. Then something beautiful happened. Jesus came to me while I was praying and He said he was there to give me a blessing. He put His hands on my head and blessed me with the capacity to handle expanding stewardships and especially going through the coming days with what those expanded stewardships equal with my energy. Then I was telling Him that I felt the heaviness of everything in my shoulders and back and it just felt SO HEAVY.
Then He did something really fascinating. Usually when I feel things in my body and I have moments with Jesus I will empty it from my body and put it in my Jesus bag. But He didn't do that this time. Instead this time He took pains and aches from my shoulders and back, it came out of me in little squares, kind of like small bricks, then He passed them down to women in my family line. Then He said, "It won't be heavy if you share it with the women who love you." Then He kept taking the pieces out of my back and shoulders and kept passing it down. They were all very willingly taking those portions of the heaviness from my body and held them for me, He told me that is what they are there for, to work together with what is happening in my life while I'm on earth, and dividing up the emotional and spiritual stewardships that felt heavy in my body is the way to make it through. It was a BEAUTIFUL experience. There were women there from hundreds of years back. It was just amazing, I felt so loved and so SEEN by all of them. And they took it very willingly and wanted to help me carry it. They didn't take it and solve it, not just what happens when I give something to Jesus, but they are helping me carry it all. It was especially wonderful because I have felt pain in my shoulders for quite some time, and I know a huge portion of that is because of the burdens I have been carrying and they were getting really heavy. And to know that I could divide up my burdens and the women who know EXACTLY what it's like to go through what I'm experiencing are all there to help me carry them.
Then I asked Him about when I could feel better, that I didn't want to be sick. Then He said, "Really Andrea?" Jesus told me that I'll feel better as soon as I decide and that in reality, "you like feeling this way because you like it when Brent takes care of you. As soon as your bucket is filled sufficiently then you will feel better." It was an interesting correspondence with the truth in my conscious. As soon as He said that I knew He was right. While I hadn't felt well Brent was taking amazing care of me, and in reality I liked it. I wanted it. I wanted to feel his care for me and I wanted him to fill up my bucket in that way. So I was
getting exactly what I wanted. Really we usually get what we want., even when we aren't willing to admit to ourselves.
After that Jesus left and I was able to get up and out of the tub. Brent doctored me up some more with essential oils on my back and spine and then I went to bed. The next day I was able to get up and function. It was exactly what I needed to happen. It was beautiful.
I love My Savior. I love Him. He is the captain of my soul. I hope you know this about me kids. That Jesus IS THE WAY. He is the way. Develop a relationship with Him. Imagine Him coming to visit you, and in reality you are spiritual creating experiences together with Him that will stay with you your entire life.
I love you,
Your Mom
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