Choosing Kindness

Dear Kids,

We just had someone who has been so ultimately kind and patient with us. Orville Lucus. He is the man who we just rented this house from.

Usually sales in the spring time are very busy with the greenhouses. Your dad has been working on getting an emergency greenhouse kit together to be ready to sell by the summer time. We had planned on spring sales getting us through financially until the emergency greenhouses were ready to be on the market.

February was amazing with sales, enough came in to catch up our bills from December and January and with enough extra to move. We just felt and thought March would be the same way.

Well, March came and went. With ONE sale. It was crazy. The first week of April came and went. NO sales. By the 5th of April we needed to pay our rent, and we didn't have it to pay. The sale that had come in, the commission was $300. So we used that for groceries, diapers, and other essentials. We just kept hoping and hoping and praying and praying for more sales. We used up any savings we had long ago (ending of asset management business and the start of the greenhouses), and have not been able to build up another rainy day fund. Thank heavens we have food storage.

Your dad had to go and talk to Orville. The day he went to talk with him we had $1.15 balance in our bank account. He went and faced him and told him the situation. Your dad said, "If you were my partner, I would tell you to give us a 3-5 day notice because we have no idea how we are going to pay our rent." Orville then asked him, "And if you were in my position what would you decide to do?". Your dad said, "I would trust me to know I am going to work my hardest to get it taken care of." Orville replied, "That is what I want to do as well. Keep me informed of your progress."

Then Orville said, as your dad was leaving the office, "Let me just give you some 'old man' advice. Go home, hug your wife and enjoy your kids. You have many blessings, everyone in your family is healthy and happy. Things could be much worse. Always count your blessings my friend, no matter how much stress you think you have."

Your dad said he was so kind about it throughout the whole meeting. No judgement, just kindness. It is obvious that his life has taught him many hard lessons, but he has learned to be kind and loving from them instead of just old and bitter.

I could take a long time to explain the stress of the last couple of weeks, but I will just sum up. Your dad ended up having to go to the Bishop to ask for help. He applied for many jobs and looked for as many side things as he could. I also did the same, putting it out there to try and make money as fast as we could. But it just didn't come in fast enough and we were going to be too far behind.

So just on Monday I took the check to Orville from the church. Your dad had previously written him an email explaining what was going on. He said, "Orville, thank you so much for your kindness and patience with us.  I found a part time job at Red Mountain Resort. I also have a tour coming up at the end of the month. We will have the money to pay for May, but I had to go to the Bishop for help for April. I am going to be at work on Monday, so Andrea will drop off the check."

When I dropped off the check the door to Orville's office was open. I walked in and handed him the check, with a smile and my face and thanked him so much for his patience with us. He then got up and took me by the shoulders and said, "How are you doing? Is everything okay with both of you?". He was SO genuinely concerned with me and my feelings. I teared up and choked back a little bit. Told him we were doing okay and we would get through. He was so kind. His eyes were eyes of wisdom. He said, "Well, just take it one day at a time and do your best. That is all we can do."

I tell you this story kids, so that I remember to always be KIND. The more and more your dad and I go through together, the more the Lord teaches us to be merciful, to stop judging people and to make it through life with gratitude.

The last month has been entirely stressful, we are (once again) a couple months behind on everything and are going to have to stretch somehow to get caught up. This is something we keep living over and over again, but we learn more and more lessons from it.

Sometimes life is really hard. Sometimes life is really stressful. But, as we saw through Orville's example, there is NEVER a reason to treat someone disrespectfully. We can ALWAYS choose how we react. We can choose in the little stressful moments of everyday how we talk to each other, whether we will love each other and influence the world around us, or whether we will allow the stress from the outside of us take over our lives.

I choose the first. I choose to be happy, no matter how much stress is here. I choose to be prayerful, no matter how much it seems my prayers aren't being answered. I choose to be faithful, no matter how long it takes. I choose to be loving, no matter how much pressure I feel. I choose to be kind, no matter how unkind life might seem to be.

I love you,

Your Mom